Nothing screams the season of love more than ranking through a tier list of best to worst experiences when it comes to romance. Thankfully, we’ve had Baldur’s Gate 3 occupying our brains for months now, and the options of characters to woo and swoon over are a big draw for most of the game’s audience in the first place. Leave the Tinder date on read and get lost in Faerun instead— you’ll leave far less disappointed.
I have had so many playthroughs of Baldur’s Gate 3 where each companion is romanced at least once in their best and worst cases. That said, this does include their ‘good’ and ‘bad’ endings, all from my personal observations throughout numerous of the playthroughs. Their ratings are based as a whole. After all, you can’t have your lovers without their various moments, right?
Overall, we have fantastic, lavish choices for all various tasting varieties. Even if one particular character is not necessarily your cup of tea, you can definitely get down at least with somebody if so desired (with enough approval).
Just going to throw this out there, THIS HAS SPOILERS.
It is pretty obvious which companions and their romances were there from the start and had longer to develop, versus the ones that were added pretty late in the game’s development. I’ll admit my bias lies with Karlach, and Astarion. Their stories and interactions melt my heart and leave me with the most fond memorable experience.
As of today, Valentine’s Day 2024, Larian Studios gifts us with another wonderful incoming patch that will have many updates. Especially highlighted in teasers, the kissing scenes and their updated interactions depending on your choices have been greatly improved. Especially if you pick some particular paths.
Larian also posted on their socials a clip of lae’zel and Shadowheart together with Shadowheart’s new kissing interaction to tease the patch release. And then today they release with another teaser of said patch. Playing into the fandoms bloodweave duo, Gale and Astarion. Having his updated ascended path kiss. So be sure to get on your knees and play to tonight instead of being alone.
Frankly it wouldn’t surprise me if the development was originally the player leaning on the Dark Urge (or durge, colloquially) and the original companions were: Astarion, Shadowheart (Shart), Lae’zel and Gale. Given the amount of interactions in the massive game. We know Karlach was added quite late, and it shows even in her romance/interactions. These are focused with the epilogue in mind as well. As lets be honest when it just ended with the final cutscene with whoever you romanced at the time was weak…. ANYWAY now to upset someone, somewhere, because their beloved isn’t in the right spot.
Honorable one night stands:
Harleep
I get the choice of a mister or mistress, like, hello? Yes, please. Something about being able to give Raphel a nice burn before beating his ass in his own house certainly makes for a worthwhile risk. We’d also be remiss to mention, the concerning interaction Astarion gives if you sleep with the succubus instead of killing them. But, that’s on his romance/friendship while in the party
The drow twins
Hilarious. It’s a brief moment, of what you could imagine for a one and done.
Give the brother the gift of doing it like an old couple. He needs a break from the freaky nights. I don’t know if I rolled poorly or what, but my scene was very dark visually. The twins are not amazing, graphically, but it is a scene coded in that game. I initially thought it was a glitch. Maybe it is, who knows, because I’ve never been able to duplicate it.
The Emperor
F tier. Get your achievement and leave.
Halsin / Minthara
Just tie them together. They come into play so late, it makes sense of the lack of content. But UGH the disappointment. Yes, part of me is just genuinely more bitter that a pure durge playthrough just for Minthara was not worth it. For one, I am very glad they patched her cutscenes so you can just knock her out and gain her approval enough later to at least enjoy her commentary. It is not enough to carry through all what is lost with the ‘evil’ playthrough, however.
Halsin is just, well, softcore. He is wholesome and wholly lacking in growth. He just comes as is.
It’s cute to have a little triad with him and Astarion, but it’s really like a side dish that you could take or leave.
Wyll
Wyll shines with potential, but he is stuck on this hero’s trail of sorts. Wooing him feels super lacking. To court Wyll is to receive a cute ending if you’re into a typical wrote fantasy hero. It’s solid enough, but is definitely missing depth. Hells, even interacting with his dad is lacking as a partner. At the time of writing, even if you are romancing Wyll, Duke Ravenguard has nothing to say. I hope there are some updates later to add to his journey, because he has some vast potential that could be explored more. Granted, as of all the possible vagabonds to romance he is the most oddly put together, and it shows in comparison to the rest of the cast.
Lae’zel
Ascended or not, Lae’zel’s romance paths are certainly rough. Getting through to her ending(s) is a struggle in appeal (to me). She comes off expectedly cold, and increasingly thaws over the course of your interactions. I did feel like I slept on her as a character in many respects, as her harsh exterior masks a lot of complexity. Her ‘good’ ending could be seen in a few ways, as she could lead Orpheus’ charge after he becomes a mind flayer, or even staying in Faerun with you, that is if you are non-gith. Lae’zel certainly turns out to be more multifaceted from the different choices made in the game. Her worst ending feels pretty obvious if she ascends to Vlaakith. It made my jaw drop. Not expected. Her overall arc is tender and certainly it’s own ride. Better interactions if you also had your character as a githyanki, and even have a special unique treat at the end. Overall, her romance was a good time.
Karlach
Even with my heavy bias with their character the romance and interactions as of writing this are super lacking with the payoffs. It shows how shoehorned in it is in spots. Nevertheless, Karlach is the sweetest, and hard not to love the wholesomeness that ends up sealing it for me. Throw me over the shoulder and take me to bed, Soldier!
Her ending is made better with the epilogue, because prior it was just a bitterly sad Greek tragedy on the docks. I wouldn’t be mad if they never made the change with the update for the epilogue and it just was at the docks. Though her ending(s) are kind of similar in ways, they’re fine. I will go with her each and every time unless she says otherwise.
Gale
Gale stumbles and is still kind of buggy in a number of places. Despite this, it’s satisfying if one manages to get through all the scenes and different interactions. Actually getting to God Gale, though, is officially considered the ‘bad’ ending for him, even though it is oddly more wholesome compared to the other campaigns ‘bad’ endings. Gale’s romances are overall mostly wholesome, as even following through with the folly of ambition in ascending to godhood, is bad. He follows through with his promise if you choose to follow him after the events of the epilogue to his realm and become a god/goddess as well. A third odd possibility which is more sad, is if he fails ascension and is snuffed out by Mystra in a truely painful epilogue interaction. If he ignores his ambition, and grows content with being ‘just Gale’ it is well paid off as he is the teacher at an academy who most likely has many to swoon. Also, how cute was being called his spouse at the end?
Shadowheart
In contrast to the power of Astarion’s romances, Shadowheart is a bit lacking with her good and bad paths. The non-shar path (good) is more fulfilling to complete at the end of the journey. However, I’m still standing by my previous belief that her character development sucked. I already ate that humble crow, so to speak, with her adoring fans in her appeal. The edgy goth girl to sweet cinnamon roll underneath troupe is desirable for a reason.
Honestly, shar-shart blows. (She’s so insufferable that killing her is almost a mercy!) If Shadowheart manages to kill in the shadowfell, she gives herself completely by the demand of Shar, to become the dark lady’s chosen — not a great way to end a relationship, as Shadowheart is left in the dark, a husk of her former potential. On the other side where Shadowheart turns from the shadows and embraces the light, her ‘good’ path is far more whole and tender, where she shines brightly.
Astarion
Ascended or not, players cannot ignore the well written differences between the two paths that give for an astounding contrasting experience, though I find myself having enjoyed the non-ascended (spawn) ending more. I can understand why ascended is appealing to the insufficient emotionally intelligent individuals who scream to the ground that being able to walk in the sun, no matter the cost is the best ending. (its not, and y’all don’t know DND options. Wish is right there, go find it).
Though I will not yuck anyone’s yum for those who do prefer the ascended path. As I had a commission piece made that was inspired by that scene (If you know, you know, yes. That one.)
The dominant, cocksure, stride is very alluring. However, it stunts him as a character from being a better, more rounded individual. The spawn ending gives more in the ways of seeing healing, growth and the character becoming more themselves. It was overwhelming for my dead heart to experience and come back to life. Redemption or not, the writing shines through and makes a lot of the others really lack in comparison and really gives the most satisfying romantic experience.
A medical student who has unhealthy obsessions with games, art and energy drinks. Resident Baldur’s Gate fanatic.
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